Because I have humble Midwest roots, I searched for a film this week that was a true representation of what that means.
There’s a lot out there – so I just watched Over the Top instead.
For those of you who don’t know – Over the Top is all about sweaty man trends…like arm wrestling…and trucks…and parental visitation rights. This movie really is a triple threat (of things that I really know nothing about…)
What you should know is that Sylvester Stallone plays a deadbeat dad who gets stuck with his kid for a weekend despite needing money and a new truck that helps him avoid things like stability and responsibility.
His ex wife is dying and insists that he spend some time with his kid, which he begrudgingly does, and then makes grunty arguments with the kid’s wealthy grandfather. Grandpa understandably hires people to kidnap the kid.
When you’re learning how to be a father and struggling to build a dream, that usually costs money. Thankfully, there’s a arm wrestling competition – winner gets $100,000 AND a brand new truck. Its a big enough deal where there’s a hefty prize, but niche enough to ensure truckers flock from everywhere to join.
I’d also like to point out Stallone’s affinity for girl cut scoop neck shirts. Flattering and gives just the right amount of edge.
Over the Top is an experiment in the Stallone Acting Method – behind those eyes, its all seriousness. Even if there’s something lighthearted going on – he’s like an animal watching his prey. DO NOT GET IN THE WAY OF HIS EMOTING.
Even when he’s making bad parenting choices (like putting your underage son behind the wheel of a large, unwieldy truck), he’s all business under those dark brown eyes.
Here we have the kid’s grandfather as the main villain of our story. According to him, Stallone is an unfit father because he hasn’t been around until now when his ex wife made him, he’s not financially stable and he’s only going to drag him to a arm wrestling tournament.
Solid reasoning so far.
You can also tell his classic ’80s villain – rich white guy, red faced yelling about business in his crisp white shirt. This is a standard if you’re playing 80s Movie Bingo.
Here we have emerging Father of Year, shoving his child into hand to hand combat. Grandpa is so close minded.
Fell the moist Stallone rage. Just staring at you through your soul and your white Brooks Brother shirt. Take that corporate paternal greed!
Lets talk about what’s important, which is the actual arm wrestling competition.
Most of the participants are giant slabs of man pecs on legs. Some of them understand the point of wearing a shirt. Some don’t.
And then some of the guys are just your dad who got super bulked up just for this.
There was this moment where Valvoline got an unexpected product placement opportunity. Note to readers – drinking motor oil will not help you in athletics or really any endeavor that you pursue. This man probably collapsed within minutes of shooting this scene.
“Where’s your Valvoline now?”
Brace yourself for Stallone’s “Straining for Victory” Face…
And in case this movie wasn’t enough for you to feel good about yourself and your own life decisions, you can always play Over the Top: The Home Game…
My hat is now officially on backwards.
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